Friday Funny

My family situation went from bad to worse, and I’m kind of hanging on by my fingernails here. (But, by golly, I’m hanging on!) I needed to find something to laugh about. Fortunately, I found this in an email a friend had forwarded. I hope it amuses you as much as it did me!

Source: Anonymous

I was at the checkout of a K-Mart. The clerk rang up $46.64 charge. I gave her a fifty dollar bill. She gave me back $46.64. I gave the money back to her and told her that she had made a mistake in MY favor. She became indignant and informed me she was educated and knew what she was doing, and returned the money again. I gave her the money back again…same scenario! I departed the store with the $46.64. This actually happened in Austin at MoPac Boulevard and Parmer Lane.

They Walk Among Us.

I walked into a Starbucks with a buy-one-get-one-free coupon for a Grande Latte. I handed it to the girl and she looked over at a little chalkboard that said “buy one-get one free.” “They’re already buy-one-get-one-free,” she said, “so I guess they’re both free” She handed me my free Lattes and I walked out the door.

They Walk Among Us

One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when one of them shouted, “Look at that dead bird!” Someone looked up at the sky and said, “Where?”

They Walk Among Us! (Cammy note: This actually sounds like something I would do.)

While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn’t want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, “Does the sun rise in the north?”

When my brother explained that the sun rises in the east, and has for sometime, she shook her head and said, “Oh I don’t keep up with that stuff.”

They Walk Among Us!!

I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was open. I told him, “The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.” He responded, “Is that Eastern or Pacific time?” Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, “Uh, Pacific.”

They Walk Among Us!

My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk.

They Walk Among Us!

My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%.

Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount.

They Walk Among Us!

I couldn’t find my luggage at the airport baggage area, so I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. “Now,” she asked me, “has your plane arrived yet?”

They Walk Among Us!

While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. “Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don’t think I’m hungry enough to eat 6 pieces.”

Yep, They Walk Among Us!

They Walk Among Us, AND they reproduce, and WORST OF ALL……………they VOTE!

Happy weekend everybody! May your days be filled with laughter and/or a strong set of fingernails!

9 thoughts on “Friday Funny

  1. YES!!! I love this.
    First, sorry to hear you’re having a hard time…. I hope something good happens soon and that your fingernails hold up.
    Now these funnies really made me laugh. Especially the line, “they walk among us.” It’s just the best.
    The fact that they reproduce reminds me of the movie “Idiocracy”, did you see it? It’s worth it for the beginning and the one joke that is the whole movie.

  2. Hilarious! I find that I usually have to help cashiers figure out how much change to give me, especially if they’ve rung me up already and I find some change in my pocket. That I can understand, if you don’t do math all the time (like I do, and you would think cashiers would), it can be confusing. But some of these are way beyond that! I found a good website once called something like “the customer is not always right”, that has some good ones as well.

    Hope things get better for your family.

  3. I hope your situation improves soon. Thanks for the funny. I needed it today. I posted a funny on my site today, also. Just in case you need additional mirth.

  4. Too funny! It’s hard to believe these people can make it through the day.
    Hold on! Sounds like you’re going to need to treat yourself to a manicure.

  5. Hi Cammy, hilarious post. SOOOO hope the stressors in your life settle down VERY soon. Keep hangin’ on!!!!

  6. Hope things sort themselves out soon. Thanks for the laugh, I want to shop at those discount stores!

  7. Cammy, so sorry things are tough in your neck of the country. I sure hope things get better & let me know if there is anything I can do – even from out here in CA.

    THX so much for the funnies – LOVED THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Will share your link with friends!

  8. One of my colleagues used to say “I so want X to paint me a murial for my bedroom.” She no longer walks among us, but I’ll never forget that.

    I hope peace returns to your family soon!

  9. Oh no, what if I am that person… great stories. So Funny. I’m sorry to hear about the family situation. I will be praying for you. Hang in there

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