Pardon me, but I’m a tad irritated this morning. I just heard a television commercial (I was digging something out of the office closet and wasn’t actually watching) that set my teeth on edge. It was for some diet product or another, and some woman was exclaiming, “My friends all say, ‘We knew you could lose the weight, but we never thought you’d keep it off’.”
Commercial Woman seems pleased by the remark, but all I can think is, What the hell kind of friend says that? If you’ve gained and lost a lot of weight several times in the past, I can understand why the thought might cross your loved ones’ minds, but to say it to your face as if it’s a compliment? Um, no.
The only comment I got that was even remotely similar was right after I reached goal, when someone (I can’t even remember who) advised me, “You need to make sure you don’t gain it back.” I was grateful for her sage advice, because I had planned that for my very next step. ::ouch! I think I hurt something rolling my eyes.::
I’m fortunate not to have had any vocal doubters on my path and only one who telegraphed her doubt via body language and a “knowing” smirk when I would talk about one of my tippy toe steps. To her credit, she admits now that she didn’t think I could lose the weight and says that she was thrilled to be proved wrong. Her only comment now is, “I will never doubt you again. You showed me how strong-willed you are.” (Personally, I thought ‘strong-willed’ was a very nice substitute for ‘stubborn.’.)
In the end, it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks about us–good or bad. What matters most is that we believe in ourselves, that we know we are more than capable of succeeding, and that we do the things we need to do to take care of ourselves.
It would be nice if the doubters kept their traps shut before and after we do it, though.
Do you have doubters? How do you handle them?